Thinking of joining the quarter of UK workers planning to change jobs in the next six months? According to People Magazine, this wave of transitions reflects a “pent-up frustration among employees seeking greater career development and work-life balance following the pandemic.”
While deciding to leave might be clear in your mind, handling the resignation conversation with your boss can be challenging. Every manager reacts differently to resignation news, and being prepared for various responses can help you navigate this crucial conversation professionally. Here’s our expert guide to the different reactions you might encounter – and how to handle each one effectively.
The Emotional Outburst: Managing Anger
It’s far from professional, but some bosses feel betrayed and lash out when they hear an employee is leaving. They’re often worried about whether it reflects on them as a manager or how they will replace you.
Suzanne Lucas, a former HR professional turned advice columnist, advises to keep your cool. “Make a plan to transition your work to your co-workers and stay positive. Your boss will get over your resignation.” If you can, play nice until the end, she suggests, and chances are you’ll still be able to get a good reference in future.
The Underminer: Dealing with Criticism
Executive coach Nihar Chhaya and marketing strategist Dorie Clark note that some insecure managers may try to criticise your future plans and disparage your new employer, possibly in a bid to persuade you to stay.
Don’t try to argue, they advise. Instead, they suggest deflecting the criticism and changing the subject with words like: “I really appreciate your concern. I’ve decided this is the best course for me, and I feel good about that decision, but thank you.”
The Manipulator: Navigating Guilt Trips
Alison Green, advice columnist at Ask A Manager, says that “a ton of managers take resignations bizarrely personally” and can try to load up employees with guilt to prevent them from leaving.
She says to ignore their pleas and to express your faith that they will hire a great replacement. “You don’t owe any employer permanent loyalty. What you do owe them is good work while you’re there, a reasonable amount of notice when you decide to leave, and help with a smooth transition before you go,” she says.
The Negotiator: Evaluating Counter-Offers
While a counter-offer might seem flattering, proceed with caution. Daniel Walters, associate director at recruitment firm Robert Walters, provides some sobering statistics: “Our research has shown that while many professionals have received counter offers during their resignation process, 39% of those who accepted returned to the job market within a year.” The reason? Often, the offer doesn’t address the underlying reasons for wanting to leave, and trust may have been compromised.
The Supporter: Appreciating Positive Reactions
This is actually the most common response you’re likely to encounter. As careers and management writer Katie Doulthwaite Wolfe explains, if you have a good relationship with your boss and they give you regular one-on-ones to talk about your career growth, you can probably expect them to be positive about your move. Her advice is simple: “All you have to do is smile and say, ‘Thank you so much for your support. I’ve enjoyed my time here and I’ve learned a lot from you.'”
The Strategic Planner: Focusing on Immediate Action Plans
Some managers immediately shift into planning mode, focusing on transition arrangements and knowledge transfer. This business-like approach might feel abrupt, but it’s often the most productive response. Be prepared with your own handover plan to demonstrate your commitment to a smooth transition.
Our Key Takeaways:
- Prepare for various reactions while maintaining your professionalism
- Have a clear transition plan ready
- Focus on the future (your own) while ensuring a smooth handover
- Remember that your career decisions are personal and valid
- Maintain positive relationships where possible for future networking
Keep in mind that resigning is a normal part of professional growth. Understanding and preparing for these common reactions allows you to navigate this transition confidently and gracefully.